Christmas season!

Today the Christmas season comes to a close!  I can't believe how fast the time went: from spending time in Naperville for Christmas, Belleville for New Years, Nashville for the FOCUS SEEK 2015 Conference, and finally Omaha for my 5 day required diaconate retreat.  Over this Christmas season God continued to bring about a clear message to me that is just fitting for Christmas: Only Christ can fill the emptiness.

The Church prepares for the Christmas in a season called Advent.  It is in the Advent season that the Church asks us to prepare for the coming of Christ.  The Church does this in her readings during the season, but in a profound way the Church lights 4 candles leading to Christmas.  These 4 candles are usually found in the Advent wreath.  For four weeks we light 4 candles (one a week) embedded in a wreath..  The Advent wreath is beautiful because each time we light an additional candle in the wreath, the hole in the center of the wreath becomes all the brighter.  It becomes more evident, not in the wreath, but in our very lives during the advent season that we are missing something; that their is an emptiness to be filled.  And what are we do fill the emptiness with?  Things? People? Job? Money? God reveals to us on Christmas day, that the hole we have in our lives was meant for Him alone.  And as we look for tangible and physical things to fill our loneliness, God comes into the world in a physical form as a small baby infant. 

It's in the manger that we find a baby.  It captures and draws us in, just like every baby we encounter.  In the the baby we see hope, joy, beauty.  Just like any baby born into the world, it needs to be tended to, nurtured and cared for.  Our relationship with Christ is no different.  We need to be attentive to Christ in our hearts and in our lives.  We need to nurture and care for that beautiful relationship that continues to reside in our hearts.

Though the Christmas season is over, it is never to late to fill the hole in our hearts by nurturing that one relationship that will end all loneliness.  Let us go like the great shepherds and the wise men to go encounter with Christ!  In the advice of St. Augustine let us bring our gifts of gold, frankincense, and myrrh; let us bring our gifts and talents, our prayers, and our sacrifices.

Diaconate Ordination Information Update!

Here are the details for my ordination:

On March 27th, 2015 at 6 PM at the St. Raymond Nonnatus, I with 4 other men will be ordained to the transitional (for I will be ordained a priest hopefully on May 21st, 2016) Diaconate.  The Ordination Mass will take about 2 hours and will be followed by a reception at the Cathedral.

St. Raymond Nonnatus Cathedral in Joliet, IL
Address is 604 N Raynor Ave, Joliet, IL 60435.

On Saturday March 28th my family will be hosting family and friends at our house from 1:00-4:30 PM. The address is 2292 Pontiac Circle, Naperville, IL 60565.

I'll be preaching and serving as a Deacon at Palm Sunday Vigil at St. Raphael's Catholic Church in Naperville. Followed by a light reception at the church. The address for the church is 1215 Modaff Road, Naperville 60540.

We may have those who are staying longer return to the house or the hotel where family is staying afterwards. Stay tuned!!!

Please know you have my prayers!

Michael

A Lonely Heart is Never Again Alone!

It's been a while, I know!  So I thought I would just do a short blog to hopefully do a little kick start and start posting more blogs :).

When I was studying out in Denver at the Augustine Institute, I came across the following quote:

The Sacrifice of Jesus accomplishes the Father's eternal plan to unite humanity with divinity...never again should we be alone, shut out or lost. When we are in shame or despair, and there seems no way out, Christ is waiting for us in silent love! ~ Olivier Clement (Roots of Christian Mysticism)

In my bible study, I always discuss 4 parts to a journey: (1)origin, (2)destination, (3)path, and (4)purpose.  When we lose our origin, we become lost.  When we lose our destination, we wander.  When we lose our path, we get frustrated.  And finally if we lose our purpose, we fall into despair.  This physical truth found in every journey is also true in the spiritual life!  This is why it is so important to know our spiritual foundations of who we are (origin).  It is also important to know where we are called to go, otherwise we wander which a lot of people have been doing in the spiritual life (destination).  Once the origin and destination is figured out, it is important to start the journey (the path).  Finally and most important, the drive to complete the journey in the face of difficulty,  especially the spiritual journey (the purpose).

The quote above from Olivier Clement reaffirms our purpose! We are never again to be alone and despair!  Jesus Christ locked in our destination (I'm going to prepare a place for you), he gave us the path (I am the way, truth and the life), he gave us the purpose - to be united God in Christ, in a particular way to be united to God in the suffering ( Remember "anyone who wants to follow me, pick up his cross and follow me").  

As I get closer to ordination and loneliness strikes, I constantly draw upon this quote.  Christ has not abandoned me.  And though I may feel alone, I'm not quite so lonely.  The Lord awaits in his silent love.  The Lord awaits in his Word, in the Eucharist, in his Body the Church.  We are not alone my friends.  Never again!  The Lord is waiting for you in the silence!  Amen.

The Lesson My 3 Year-Old God Daughter Taught Me!

This past summer between assignments I had a two week window for vacation.  I hit the road in excitement for a cross country adventure from the Midwest to Colorado and back.  The highlight of my trip was the opportunity to spend time with my God children; 3 of which are in the picture (Brendan, Luke and Colleen).  Little did I know, out of all the people I was able to visit, it was the time I spent with my God children that would lead me to my greatest meditation and challenge this year leading up to my Ordination.  

It had been over a year since I had the opportunity to see my God children. I always prepare myself because of my yearly visit, they change so much in a year!!! On this trip, there was another surprise: it was my God daughter, Colleen and how she would capture my heart.   

My trip began meeting the family at the local children's museum.  Brendan and Luke of course carried their similar personalities from my last visit, but Colleen's personality caught me off guard. At the museum, Colleen took on a small ropes course without any reservation that was built for a child twice her size.  Even her brothers, who were adventurous in their own right, were showing some hesitation as they went through the course.  She was fearless!   

This was followed by another adventure; a trip to the local pool.  Luckily we had an adult for each child, which we would rotate around!  The pool was a time of craziness: water-gun fights and attempts to go to the deep end of the pool.  Part of the time I was able to carry Colleen.  This involved taking her from one side of the pool to the other and helping her splash her brothers!  

As much as those events were filled with laughter and some tears from chlorine in our eyes, there was a particular moment that will remain in my mind and heart.  It was the time I was with Colleen by the pool's edge.  I sat her on the concrete edge of the pool and I gave her the encouragement to fall into my arms. You could see on her face that she had some hesitancy with my plan (as if she was saying, you gotta be kidding me? or "what you talking about Willis?").  But after another word of encouragement, she leaned forward and fell into my arms and I caught her!  Right when she came to understand what happened, her smile and laughter could fill anyone's heart.  I put her once again by the pool's side, but this time I had her stand.  She fell into my arms again with even greater excitement and trust.  Before I knew it, she was throwing herself into the water as I stepped further and further away from the pool's edge.  How beautiful was it to see her complete abandonment, and how much joy she had received when she was caught!

As I continue to pray through my discernment toward the Catholic Priesthood, I can't help but see this image reappear in my prayers.  Day in and day out, I see the Lord taking me to the edge, and asking me to jump in trust!  This didn't start with a large jump nor total abandonment, but me first leaning and letting my momentum take me off the edge.  Immediately, (in scriptural terms) the Lord caught me and there was joy in falling into the arms of my Lord. But it didn't end there, the Lord once again placed me on the edge.  This time standing up, the Lord asked me to jump and again the Lord caught me!  I soon began to understand the same joy my God daughter felt in her small acts of abandonment by jumping into the pool.  

Right now, as we speak, the Lord is placing me on the edge like my God daughter at the pool and He's taking a few more steps away from the edge and asking me to really jump!  But unlike my God daughter who had complete abandonment, I'm starting to freak out!  There is a fear; will the Lord continue to catch me?  What if He's not there this time? What if there comes a time He won't be there?  

Of course, as I continue to pray and reflect I can't help but think of all the times the Lord has caught me in my acts of abandonment: from choosing ministry over engineering, from being diagnosed with Hodgkin's Lymphoma, from entering the seminary, from leaving the seminary only to find myself being called to re-enter the seminary. The Lord has always caught me.  And without fail, I found myself with great joy in my abandonment to the Lord.  What is better then jumping into the Lord's arms with complete abandonment?  Nothing! I have my God daughter to thank for that wonderful meditation and challenge.  So here goes nothing, I'm ready to jump! 

Label Maker + Finding Out My Sister's Crush = My Sister's Nightmare (Need for our Invitation to God)

When I was in 6th grade, I happened to find out who my sister's high school freshmen date was to her homecoming dance.  His name was John Hall.  What does a 6th grader do with that information, especially a 6th grader that had an old school label maker (new at the time)?

Maybe I would write "Tina likes John Hall!" a hundred times.  And maybe I took those labels and placed them all over her books, folders, and make-up compact mirror?  Needless to say my sister spent the rest of the following week discovering these gifts of love!

Now that I am a little older I can reflect back and see how I was a nightmare to my sister, Tina.  It also probably explained the fact why my sister seemed to be a little more secretive about her future crushes.   Also, as I look back, I saw myself trying to jump into my sister's life.  Being the youngest sibling with two older sisters, I remember my sisters bringing their friends over to the house.  I would invade their space wanting to be apart of their friendships.  But that's not how friendships are formed or love received.

When I think of love, specifically the love of God, God doesn't invade our space, He patiently waits for our invitation for Him to enter into our lives.  He waits during our greatest joys and most tragic parts of our lives for that invitation.

I saw this in my ministry this summer.  I was blessed to be a chaplain at a hospital in central Illinois.  It was interesting how I would get many different reactions to my knocking at their door; some people were openly happy for my visit, while others told me "goodbye" before I could say anything else (which I graciously left).  My hope was not to invade into their life (like when I was in 6th grade), but enter into their life and hospital room through their invitation.  

There is one patient that stands out in particular.  She wasn't really practicing any faith.  She was raised somewhat Christian when she was younger, but stopped practicing and going to any church long ago.  She was in her mid 30's, her life was turned upside down and was not like anything she had ever planned.  She was diagnosed with an incurable illness that could only be treated by heavy medication.  She no longer had communication with or support from her family, and her friends had abandoned her because she could no longer contribute to their social activities.  I entered the room asking if I could sit and talk, she said yes.  And for the next two hours we talked about life, difficulties, and faith.  At the end of my visit, I was clear that I couldn't promise healing of the body (though I would pray for that), but I did point to one important fact from this visit; the power of the invitation before her!   I pointed to the fact that her illness opened up the opportunity for our conversation.  For by her own admittance, she said she would have never talked to me if she was perfectly healthy.  I told her that her illness, though not a direct act of God (that God desired her illness), opened her heart to an invitation to God and the Christian faith once more.

Coming back on retreat, I can't help but to continue to pray for that patient and that 2 hour conversation we had.  And on retreat I came across this beautiful meditation of God and humanity; God does not force Himself upon us.  The Incarnation points to this reality.  First, God asks Mary if she would be the vessel in which the Word would become flesh.  It is only after her yes that she becomes pregnant with the Son of God.  

It's a beautiful thing how gentle and patient The Lord is with us.  He's not abrupt trying to invade our personal space, but God does have His labels over all of creation.  The Lord is waiting for our open invitation to let Him enter.  I'm so glad that God is not like me, especially when I was in 6th Grade!  Needless to say, Tina no longer likes John Hall.  However there may be one or two more labels to be found in her old high school folders.  

Beauty of Being Chosen!

it's very hard for a kid in today's culture of sports and activities not to come across times when captains are selected and the anxiety of being chosen begins.  Now in my own experience, if I was good at the sport, it always felt great to see the disappointment of the other captain's face when he couldn't choose me, while at the same time, it was very difficult to swallow my pride when I was chosen last. It was as if people were bluntly telling me that I was not wanted and the feeling of rejection pierced my heart!

This desire to be chosen (or the feeling of not being chosen) does not only find itself in games and sports, but also in love!  How beautiful and exciting it is when you fall in love and the person you have fallen for has also chosen you!  I recently had a friend, on the day of her wedding say to her spouse, "I choose you!"  The words every spouse wants to hear from their loved ones.  All love stories are based on the idea of being chosen by the other.  

This desire to be chosen is no different in the areas of our faith!  It is also an area that we constantly forget about!  We need to remind constantly that the Lord, God has chosen us!  I recently came across the following quote:  

"This is one way of stating the difference between gods and men.  Gods choose; men are chosen.  What men lose when they become as free as gods is precisely that sense of being chosen, which encourages them, in their gratitude, to take their subsequent choices seriously" - Philip Rieff, The Triumph of the Therapeutic

In a society with strong emphasis on freedom, we have become as free as gods (being able to choose many things in life).  But by being caught up in the ability to choose, we actually lose something very important; the excitement of being chosen.  This story of the human person isn't new!  Actually we see this explained in the story of Adam and Eve, where the serpent tempts them to eat from the tree of knowledge of good and evil so that they would become like God!  In grasping after that freedom, they lose their identity of being chosen as God's children.  

The Christian faith reversing the conditions of the fall points to this redeemed reality - that God has chosen us!  John 15:16 - "You did not choose me, but I who chose you!"  God has chosen us!  God who is love, has revealed his love for us in Christ!   He sent his only Son for us!  God continually chooses to bring us into communion of persons in the Trinity. This simple understanding should leave us speechless, smiling, and finding great joy!  

If we are struggling to smile or finding ourselves with lack of joy, we need to remind ourselves of those times that God's love has been revealed his love for us, we were reminded of being chosen.  We need to remind ourselves of the story of Christ, when God made the decision to act within human history and intervene on our behalf and reveal His love for us!  

Let us call to mind John 15:16 - "You did not choose me, but I who chose you!" and proceed to jump and down in excitement!  God has chosen us!

I Want My Flesh-Pots!!! The Need for the Eucharist, the True Bread from Heaven!

I recently taught my 8th grade students at MTCA, while I was on my internship assignment, the similarities between the story of Israel and the story of our lives.  

The following picture was drawn not so neatly on the dry erase board!

Israel was enslaved for 400 years in Egypt just as God told Abraham in Genesis 15:13.  [Side note: 400 = 40 (means a generation or a person's lifetime) x 10 (means completeness).  Therefore, 400 years of slavery represents a complete lifetime of slavery]  The Israelites were freed from sin and slavery when Moses guides the Israelites through the Red Sea.  It was in that same action, that the Egyptian armies pursued the Israelites into the Red Sea, only to be killed in the water.  The action reveals God's freeing action of the Israelites from sin and slavery.  The Israelites spend the next 40 years in the desert. [remember 40 years represent a generation or a person's lifetime] only to be led through another body of water, the Jordan river, into the promise land.

How does this relate to our lives?  Like the Israelites, we too were born into a complete sin and slavery, known as Original Sin.  We too, like the Israelites, are saved by passing through the waters, the waters of Baptism.  It's in this saving act, we are SENT on our journey toward the promise land, which is Heaven.  It's only after spending a lifetime of journeying toward the promise land, that we pass through another water, which death, that leads us to Heaven!  

But the comparison doesn't stop there. After sharing the foundation of Israel's story with the students, I continued to point out deeper! If we actually read Israel's story closer, we would see that the Israelites were attached to their life of sin and slavery.  They actually constantly doubted the Lord and wanted to turn back to Egypt.  [This is revealed in the creation of the Golden Calf, an Egyptian god, found in Exodus 32].   The Israelites would prefer going back to Egypt, which includes sin and slavery, than live a life that had them constantly trusting in The Lord's providence.  Take in mind, that this is still after the Israelites saw the power of God through the 10 plagues, the parting of the Red Sea, the pillar of smoke in the day time, and the pillar of fire at night; the Israelites continued to complain to Moses:

"Would that we had died by the hand of The Lord in the land of Egypt, when we sat by the fleshpots and ate bread to the full; for you have brought us out into this wilderness to kill this whole assembly with hunger" ~ Exodus 16:3

The fleshpots were believed to be huge stew-pots made up of swine meat.  To the Jews, these fleshpots were prohibited because swine were seen as unclean animals and should not be eaten. The Israelites, in a sense, would rather live a life of sin and slavery, than continue the difficult road of life trusting in the Lord in the desert. 

How true is that in our life!?!  Though we have been saved by the waters of Baptism, and in many cases have been sealed by the gifts of the Holy Spirit through the Sacrament of Confirmation, we find ourselves desiring to go back to the slavery of sin.  Rather than trusting in the Lord's company and providence, we constantly desire to seek out pleasures that would draw us away from God.  G.K Chesterton hits this point right on the head, when he stated, "Christianity has not been tried and found wanting; it has been found difficult and not tried."  If we pursue our Christian life, and if we our truly honest with ourselves, we will admit having the same temptations likes the Israelites.  We would admit, like the Israelites, "we want our fleshpots!"  

So what is the answer or response to these temptations.  The answer is found in Israel's story once again!  The Lord feeds the Israelites with Manna, the Bread from Heaven.  For us as Christians as we journey through life, we too are given the Bread from Heaven.   Jesus Christ gives us Himself as food for our journey in the Eucharist.  By partaking in the Body and Blood of Christ, we are given the strength and grace to continue on the difficult road toward Heaven.  Let us not be discouraged by the difficulties found in the journey of life.  Let us turn away from the temptations of our various fleshpot desires.  And finally let us turn, all the more, to The Lord as the source of true food that will give us strength for the journey to our Eternal home!