The Physical, the Real: the Word Was Made Flesh

It opens in the Gospel of John: "The Word was made flesh and dwelt among us."  This continues to be the profound part of this pilgrimage.  To come to the realization that the spiritual is not something of ideals, something unattainable or unseen, but something physical and real; something that continues to be seen physically held today!  We have spent some time in Bethlehem, and I can't count the numerous blessings it has been to visit the Church of the Nativity Grotto pray, meditate in awe about what this spot actually means!  God became flesh!  He dwelt and continues to dwell among us in the flesh!

(picture of me above the star, marking Christ's birth)

Last night, the seminarians arranged with the Franciscan friars to have time in the Grotto by ourselves. The Church of the Nativity is open until 5:30 PM most days, but is locked down after that time.  During the open hours, tour busses upon tour busses arrive and large crowds come in to venerate, look, take pictures, and move on. Some are moved by faith, others are just there to see something they have been told is special, they take their picture and move on.  The bustle can be distracting.  So to have the opportunity in silence to pray a whole hour before the Lord at night in the candle light was quite a gift!

I sat on the steps using my left hand to hold me up.  The weight of my upper body rested on the palm of my hand and all of sudden I noticed something.  I felt my heart beat through the hand on the ground!  It started getting louder and louder as I paid more attention to it!  I couldn't believe it, I could feel the beat of life (my own existence) coming from the spot where human life completely changed; God becoming Incarnate.  From the feeling of my own heart beat, I imagined the heart beat of our Lord.  Something so intimate that only our holy Mother could feel until the coming of his birth.  In a sense I felt Christ's heart beat in me for the first time! (It is not I who live, but Christ who lives in me!)  How beautiful it was to realize, once again, the physical truth of our faith - The Word was made flesh and dwelt among us!  And because of this fact, my life, just like in this moment, will never be the same.

Being a Shepherd for 10 minutes!

Yesterday, we had the opportunity to go to Neot Kedumim (Pleasant Pasture) - It was a recalling of the agricultural aspects of biblical times; from animals, plants, and tools.  It's mainly a field trip for middle school children, but 33 grown seminarians can also learn a lot too!

One of the meditations that came from the trip was when we had the opportunity to shepherd sheep and goats.  We had a small obstacle course, where we had to herd the sheep and goats into various circles, while avoiding other objects.  Of course there is usually only one person doing this job, not two groups of 17 guys.  It just made our job easier.

The meditation came two fold.  First, Pope Francis is known for saying that the priest needs to have the smell of the sheep on them.  In other words, he was challenging the priests to be entrenched with the people, not hiding in their house or safe in their various distant ministries.  The second came to Christ carrying the lost sheep. I don't know about you, but when I think of Christ carrying a sheep.  I have the following image.

The sheep is all nice, white, and even a little cuddly.  The reality was far from the picture. I had a brief idea before arriving to Neot Kedumim of carrying the lost sheep, then we had the opportunity to get up close and personal. 

Ignoring the goats, the sheep's wool was all knotted and dirty.  Many of the sheep were not even too shy to use the outdoor facilities right in front of us.  Basically the wool was covered in dirt, possibly fleas, along with covered in their own "stuff" (to keep it clean for the youngens).  The idea I had of carrying a sheep on my shoulders or picking one up was far from my mind.  So I took this nice distant picture.

It was then I started realizing that to be a true shepherd in Christ's Church will be, however, just that; dirty.  It will involve getting into the muck of sin, people's own "stuff" to be able to lead and guide them in the right direction.  I will have to listen to our Pope, I must have the courage to respond and have the smell of the sheep all over me!  But to make it clear, I made sure to stay from the "stuff" on the sheep's wool behind me in this picture! :)

Please pray for all the clergy, including the men preparing for the priesthood as we are being encouraged to enter into the trenches and lead the people of God in the midst of "stuff!"

I'm Blind, Oh Wait; I Just Need to Take Off My Sunglasses.

One of my favorite stories told to me while I was in Kansas City as a FOCUS missionary came from one of my teammates.  She told us the story when she thought she went completely blind.  She went to bed, only to wake up with every light in the house completely off.  She couldn't see the normal light that would come into the house from the street light, she couldn't see the light from her clock, so she reached for her glasses on the nightstand, put her glasses on, and realized she actually couldn't see anything at all.  She went stumbling throughout the house yelling "I'm Blind, I'm Blind, I can't see."  While stumbling through the house, patting at the wall trying to find every light switch she could to turn them on.  But alas, no light was coming as she continued to yell "I'm Blind."  All of the sudden, the power outage ended, all the lights in the house went on, and she had realized that she had placed her sunglasses on while her parents, awoken from their daughter screaming, just looked at her.

I had a less dramatic, yet similar story.  Throughout the hill country of Judea there are many caves to explore.  We were waiting to go into the Mar Saba Monastery, a beautiful Greek Orthodox Monastery built 15 stories down from a ridge.  

As we waited, we started to explore the area around, only to find a cave that had been bricked up with a small entry point.  As I went into the cave, I couldn't see anything!  I was wondering what was taking my eyes so long to adjust.  I reached into my pocket to turn on my iPhone flashlight to help me see, but that did absolutely nothing.  Without yelling I'm blind, I felt a bit confused on why I couldn't see anything.  Then I realized it and I removed my sunglasses.

I bring this up because it hit me in my meditation that day.  Yes, there is darkness in the world, and yes sometimes we are caught in the midst of that darkness, but sometimes we actually contribute to our own blindness by putting on, deliberately or undeliberately, our sunglasses!  For me, as I prayed and asked the Lord to reveal to me what my sunglasses were: he revealed to me a simple truth.  When I thought about myself; wants and desires - I would find myself alone and sad, along with anxiety with my upcoming diaconate ordination.  When I thought about God and His love for me, through the gift of my friends and families, I felt peace and joy, and there was excitement for my upcoming ordination!  My sunglasses, at least at this moment and meditation (I'm sure there are others), was a life centered on myself; to be self-absorbed in my wants and desires.

Please continue to pray for the 37 of us on this pilgrimage as we continue to seek the Lord, and I ask in a particular way to continue to pray, leading up my diaconate ordination, that I can get rid of my darn sunglasses! (metaphorically of course)

You have my prayers!

Pondering in My Heart - What Child is this

Today I had the opportunity to go to Shepherd's Field.  It's right on the edge of Kidron Valley, about a mile and a half out of Bethlehem.  It was there that the shepherds were greeted by angels, "Be not afraid; for behold I bring you good news of a great joy which will come to all the people; for to you is born this day in the city of David (Bethlehem) a Savior, who is Christ the Lord.  And this will be a sign for you: you will find a babe wrapped in swaddling cloths and lying in a manger" (Luke 2:10-12).  The shepherds went in haste and found the Holy Family in Bethlehem.

     

     After they told Mary what they had been told concerning the child from the angels, "Mary kept all these things in her heart" (Luke 2:19).  These words continue to reside in my own mind and heart as I try to comprehend the very foundation of the Incarnation, God becoming man.  We went to Shepherd's field and celebrated Mass.  Afterwards we had the opportunity to move along the fields including the ruins of a 4th century Byzantine Church. It was here (or at least in the proximity of this site) that the great news was proclaimed by the angels.  

(One of the many alters found on Shepherds field)

      Though it wasn't part of the program, I couldn't help, but like the shepherds, run in haste to find the birth place of my Lord.  I returned to the Church of the Nativity to once again gaze at the manger where Christ, God laid.  Once again, following the foot steps of Mary, I could only leave the experience pondering in my heart: What Child is this!

What Child is this who, laid to rest

On Mary’s lap is sleeping?

Whom angels greet with anthems sweet,

While shepherds watch are keeping?

This, this is Christ the King,

Whom shepherds guard and angels sing;

Haste, haste, to bring Him laud,

The Babe, the Son of Mary.

Why lies He in such mean estate,

Where ox and ass are feeding?

Good Christians, fear, for sinners here

The silent Word is pleading.

Nails, spear shall pierce Him through,

The cross be borne for me, for you.

Hail, hail the Word made flesh,

The Babe, the Son of Mary.

So bring Him incense, gold and myrrh,

Come peasant, king to own Him;

The King of kings salvation brings,

Let loving hearts enthrone Him.

Raise, raise a song on high,

The virgin sings her lullaby.

Joy, joy for Christ is born,

The Babe, the Son of Mary.

The Manger where Christ laid!

From the Cisterns in the Desert to Living Streams

Today our pilgrimage did a day trip down south.  We drove down along the Dead Sea to make it to a rock and fortress formation named Masada.  King Herod built on this rock formation a fortress just in case he needed security.  It was protected by the desert on all sides and the closest body of water was the Dead Sea, which of course is undrinkable.  How was this fortress in the middle of the desert a good idea, if people were to live there (including 6-7 century Byzantine monks)? Deep Cisterns!  

(Just imagine this cistern being completely filled)

I could only think about that in the spiritual life.  In many cases throughout our life we go through dryness in our lives.  We encounter trials of sadness and difficulties.  Many times we feel that we are being attacked on all sides (bills, health, relationships)!  How are we to survive?  I can only look at these deep cisterns that would collect water for over long periods of time to sustain future life.  Masada is known to average about 2 inches of rain a year!  Just imagine the work it would take to fill this cistern!  The question's I can only ask, have I prepared in my life cisterns that will help sustain me in dryness or difficulty?  Am I taking the time to fill my cistern?  Am I ignoring that which will later sustain me? Am I taking time for prayer and reflection?  Am I reminding myself how the Lord has guided and protected me thus far? Are I working on building up my relationship with God to sustain all kinds of attacks? From any kind of losses or even death?  Don't wait to start developing a sustaining life in God, in Christ! 

After stopping at Masada, we drove back north to stop at the Ein Gedi - a life giving spring in the middle of the desert.  The only fresh water source in the area!  This brings light to another truth in the spiritual life.  Christ promises to give living water (John 4) to the Samaritan woman.  Not cistern water, which runs out and is dirt and mucky at the bottom, or well water that can eventually dry out.  Christ promises living water, something that is always fresh and always new!  How beautiful it was to see life growing in the middle of the desert!  It brings the spiritual question - has Christ become my living spring?  Have I allowed Christ to always renew me!  Do I trust, in the midst of the desert and troubles that the Lord will draw me to himself, the oasis, bringing new life!  

So in the end - cisterns are good (necessary in our work to get through difficult times), but we must always turn to the living waters that only God can provide?

"House of Bread" - Bethlehem

We arrived into Tel Aviv, Israel early in the morning to start our pilgrimage.  From the airport we were blessed to start our trip by visiting the town in which Christ was born.  The tour guide reminded us as we entered the town of Bethlehem, the meaning of the name: "House of Bread."  How beautiful our Christian faith is, Jesus Christ was born and later proclaimed, as he does today, "I am the bread of life."  

Today, I had the opportunity with other seminarians to visit the birth place of Christ at the Church of the Nativity.  The Church is shared with three Christian Traditions: Roman Catholics led by the Franciscans, the Greek Orthodox, and the Armenian Orthodox.  To enter the church leading to the Grotto (the place where Christ was born) you have to bow your head to enter the Church!  It's just like in the Mass, when we bow our heads during the Creed with a slight bow acknowledging the Incarnation of God: "and by the Holy Spirit was incarnate of the Virgin Mary, and became man."  

         Love always has the ability to capture.  And to say that my heart was captured by the Mass in the cave in which Christ was born is an understatement.  During the Mass I was pushed back into a cove because we were squeezing 20 guys into a small area.  I later found out that I was squeezed into the cove where Christ was laid in the manger.  I couldn't help, in the midst of the craziness and the crowd, even when I was unaware of it, the Lord was asking me to rest with him in the manger where he laid. There I was, after receiving our Lord in the Eucharist, bent completely over looking at the manger.  It was there that I lifted up a prayer to all the families I have encountered, for this was the place where the Holy Family began and resided.

        The Pilgrimage is just beginning, yet I believe one of the most powerful moments of this trip will be when I was able to receive Jesus Christ, the Bread of Life, in the town named "house of bread." It was there that the Lord was born and asked me to rest with him in the manger.  

Christmas season!

Today the Christmas season comes to a close!  I can't believe how fast the time went: from spending time in Naperville for Christmas, Belleville for New Years, Nashville for the FOCUS SEEK 2015 Conference, and finally Omaha for my 5 day required diaconate retreat.  Over this Christmas season God continued to bring about a clear message to me that is just fitting for Christmas: Only Christ can fill the emptiness.

The Church prepares for the Christmas in a season called Advent.  It is in the Advent season that the Church asks us to prepare for the coming of Christ.  The Church does this in her readings during the season, but in a profound way the Church lights 4 candles leading to Christmas.  These 4 candles are usually found in the Advent wreath.  For four weeks we light 4 candles (one a week) embedded in a wreath..  The Advent wreath is beautiful because each time we light an additional candle in the wreath, the hole in the center of the wreath becomes all the brighter.  It becomes more evident, not in the wreath, but in our very lives during the advent season that we are missing something; that their is an emptiness to be filled.  And what are we do fill the emptiness with?  Things? People? Job? Money? God reveals to us on Christmas day, that the hole we have in our lives was meant for Him alone.  And as we look for tangible and physical things to fill our loneliness, God comes into the world in a physical form as a small baby infant. 

It's in the manger that we find a baby.  It captures and draws us in, just like every baby we encounter.  In the the baby we see hope, joy, beauty.  Just like any baby born into the world, it needs to be tended to, nurtured and cared for.  Our relationship with Christ is no different.  We need to be attentive to Christ in our hearts and in our lives.  We need to nurture and care for that beautiful relationship that continues to reside in our hearts.

Though the Christmas season is over, it is never to late to fill the hole in our hearts by nurturing that one relationship that will end all loneliness.  Let us go like the great shepherds and the wise men to go encounter with Christ!  In the advice of St. Augustine let us bring our gifts of gold, frankincense, and myrrh; let us bring our gifts and talents, our prayers, and our sacrifices.